Stephen Harper's e-mail distribution list got hacked on Sunday. The person or persons responsible sent out two e-mails: The first was a sort-of adorable faux confession that said stuff like: "My name is Stephen Harper. I am an ALBERTAN, here me roar! My goal is to make Canada America's 51st state and destroy health care that all Canadians cherish by infusing my propaganda with hard core ad hominem attacks." The second was a one-paragraph e-mail......

Ever since Prime Minister Harper called the October 14 election, the typically more-reserved Canadian party leaders have dug their trenches and attacked. If you didn’t know better, you might think the U.S. presidential election has crept north of the border. This isn’t to say Canadian politics has never been dirty, it’s just that the context of this year’s contest is, well, different. Similar to the Canadian election in November of 2000, this year’s battle......

It's been a pretty dependable rumour these days, but now the Prime Minister's office has finally confirmed it: there will be an official election call for October 14. At 8 a.m. on Sunday morning, Stephen Harper will mosey from 24 Sussex over to Rideau Hall to get permission (albeit a simple technicality) from Governor General Michaëlle Jean to dissolve the 39th Parliament. And here we go again…......

Last night's town hall meeting was an auspicious birth ceremony for the week-old Department of Culture. Speaker Naomi Klein termed it a “movement moment” and member Darren O'Donnell could only say “Holy fuck!” to the attendance, as more than triple the expected number of people crowded into the AC-less Theatre Centre. Leaflets were used by every member of the crowd to cool themselves while community leaders stirred existing anger at the Harper government. “You......

Four children aged approximately 8 to 9 years old were taken to hospital yesterday after ingesting or coming into contact with a pool cleaning agent—believed to be muriatic acid—at a Royal Canadian Yacht Club swimming pool yesterday. For those of you unfamiliar with the name "muriatic acid," you will be relieved to find out that it's just another name for plain old hydrochloric acid. Aren't you relieved? The area surrounding the Rogers Centre was......

The McGuinty government is preparing legislation to combat "driver distraction," which will likely mean no more hand-held cell phones, Blackberries, Gameboys, iPods, or other "electronic distractions" while you're at the wheel. So much for the Torontoist mobile Wii tennis tournament. In an increasingly familiar Parliamentary ritual, Stephen Harper dared Stéphane Dion to bring down the government and let the voters decide who they like, this time on the issue of the Liberals' proposed carbon......

Omar Khadr's lawyers recently released video footage of Khadr's interrogation by CSIS agents in hopes that the video would embarrass the Prime Minister and garner sympathy from Canadians. Unsurprisingly, the PM's office wasn't hearing that noise. Clearly these lawyers don't know how hard it is to embarrass Stephen Harper. Speaking of Canadians in trouble in the States, Barenaked Ladies frontman Steven Page was arrested in Fayetteville, New York for possession of cocaine and marijuana.......

At Friday's Jays-Yankees game, Alex Rodriguez got hit where it hurts when a pack of Jays fans—one who looks conspicuously like Seann William Scott—teased him with photos of Madonna. (Cynthia Rodriguez had just filed for divorce, her lawyer saying that she was "emotionally cheated" on by her husband with the singer.) Unfortunately, Rodriguez struck back by exploiting the Jay's only weakness: getting many runs scored against them. Toronto Public Health wants kids and teenagers to......

Stephen Harper's Conservatives are running ads on the radio and at some gas pumps asserting that a proposed Liberal carbon tax is a "trick" and a tax grab. Firing back, Liberal Environment critic David McGuinty said that the Tories are in the pocket of the oil industry. No need to to fight, people; no doubt you're both right. A female gorilla named Ngozi has been shipped from Seattle to Toronto in the hope that......

The committee charged with reviewing Ontario's payday loans law recommends a hard usury cap of sixty percent. Were it any lower, payday loan companies would have to shut down and go get real jobs and make their mothers proud of them. Were it any higher, payday loan companies would be dancing in the streets and shouting "hooray!" So sixty percent is apparently the fair number. A judge will decide today whether a videotaped interview......

Prime Minister Stephen Harper won't be attending the opening ceremonies of the Beijing Olympics, but says that it has nothing to do with the current situation in Tibet. A cautious Canada walks the middle ground of diplomacy, earning the emnity of the Chinese government without even making a useful political statement. Tory MP Tom Lukiwski has apologized for homophobic remarks he made on video back in 1991, when he referred to "homosexual faggots with......

Robot surgeon at St. Michael's proving extremely successful. Our future robot overlords approve of the surgeon's actions, as he gathers critical data about the obsolete meat sacks who, through the accident called evolution, have dominated the planet until now. Crazy Hummer-limo joyride leaves destruction in its wake. The total damages included one person with minor injuries, a hydro pole, three vehicles and a house. While Torontoist, of course, condemns the twenty-year-old idiot who took the......

City sells "the McDonald's site" on Bloor for a fairly low price. However, Adam Vaughan insists there are upsides to the deal, such as being able to limit the height of the condo development that will take its place, because who would want tall buildings in the downtown core? Patrick Swayze has pancreatic cancer. Although initial reports that he has "weeks to live" were apparently false, pancreatic cancer is still one of the deadliest......

It snowed again last night, so if you're going anywhere, it'll probably take you a long time. However, we're getting another storm on the weekend so you might as well wait before you start shovelling. Actually, it'll be spring in a couple of weeks anyway so if you have enough cans of SpaghettiO's, it's probably best to just stay home til then. The Bank of Canada slashed interest rates by fifty basis points yesterday,......

New glass recycling program will save local municipalities millions of dollars. It turns out that you can turn used glass into other things than smaller bits of broken glass! Stephen Harper threatens to sue Stéphane Dion for libel over allegations of bribery. Harper, long an advocate of tort reform, explained that while limiting the ability of people to sue is generally a good thing, he didn't mean that it should apply to him. Tory......

Toronto Zoo to go green. The Zoo will now focus on biodiversity and sustainability while presenting animals from around the world in small, depressing, joke-like habitats that offer a crude mockery of how the animals would prefer to live, focusing on the fact that while their lives in the zoo might suck, at least nobody is killing these animals for fun, as would frequently happen in the wild. Prince Harry being withdrawn from Afghanistan. It......

Say hello to a "prudent" budget. Stéphane Dion criticized the bill for being ineffectual, but of course not so ineffectual that the Liberals would vote against it and force an election. (Elsewhere, Thomas Walkom points out that the budget includes a new system of income tax shelter that will, and I am sure you are surprised by this, primarily benefit wealthy Canadians.) Julian Fantino complains about "discount sentences." Apparently, the idea that experienced criminals......

TTC "U-pass" close to passing for students, possibly also hotel workers. If the scheme passes, the TTC will suddenly be crowded once again, rendering all those recent fleet upgrades essentially moot. Hooray for public transit! Jack Layton calls for Family Day to be named a national holiday. He then asked for a pony and all the candy he could ever eat ever, on the basis that it was about as likely that Stephen Harper would......

The Tory minority government is double-dog-daring the Opposition to force an election over their crime bill. Prediction: Stéphane Dion will grumble and pretend he doesn't care, Jack Layton will howl impotently, and the Bloc will negotiate another billion dollars for folk-dancing in Rimouski. Stephen Harper is truly the alpha Parliamentarian in this bunch. Did you know that Toronto has already gotten as much snow this winter as the past two winters combined, and that......

Kennedy Station will remain closed today, at least for the morning. So, if you live in Scarborough, enjoy those shuttle buses. It's Super Tuesday! Barack Obama is closing the gap with Hillary Clinton in a number of key states, most notably California. Meanwhile, the Republican race is boiling down to a dogfight between Mitt Romney, running on the "I hate liberals the most" platform, and John McCain, running on the "I might actually be......

Everyone's favourite appropriately-named party leader hasn't been having a great time over the past few months. Ever since John Tory's upsetting dual loss in October's provincial election, the vultures have been circling over him. Both established and grassroots party members have been calling for Tory's head, and they'll finally have a chance to oust him at the Progressive Conservative Party's General Meeting at the end of the month. The anti-Tory camp's main argument is, simply......

Hey, did you know it's snowing? School buses have already been cancelled for today, meaning that children will romp and play in the streets and sabotage snowplow drivers and Chevy Chase will duel with a rival meteorologist for some reason and the mayor will declare it to be the "funnest day ever." Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton have a nice, pleasant debate about minute policy issues. The debate was thus about as interesting as watching......

Chalk River reactor's risk level was 1,000 times greater than normal. However, Stephen Harper is a certified nuclear engineer, so if he says it's safe, then shouldn't we trust him? Wait, what? He's not a certified nuclear engineer? Well, dang. John McCain wins crucial Florida primary. The old coot narrowly defeated the Mormon android and the world's angriest ex-mayor to maintain his momentum in the Republican candidates' race. Meanwhile, Hillary Clinton beat Barack Obama in......

The Falconer report on violence in Toronto schools talks of a "culture of fear," saying that many students bring weapons to school, and many crimes go unreported. Some of the basic recommendations to fix things include more social workers and after-school basketball, fewer suspensions, more diverse teaching staff, and gun-sniffing springer spaniels to roam the halls. Sir Edmund Hillary, the New Zealander who was the first person to reach the summit of Mount Everest,......

City service fees to increase? Toronto's recreation department wants to increase user fees by 21 percent this year and a total of 81 percent over seven years. Because you know who doesn't pay their fair share? Poor people! Barack Obama, John McCain surging in polls as New Hampshire primaries take place. In related news, Obama and McCain both won the small villages of Dixville Notch and Hart's Location, both of which had their complete......

See, all that snow shovelling was just a waste of time. Toronto is expecting record-breaking heat over the next couple of days, with highs expected to hit 13 degrees. The heat wave is expected to give dumbass radio personalities a chance to say things like, "Hey, this global warming thing is OK by me!" Polls indicate that Stephen Harper won't be able to form a majority government unless he can improve his popularity with......

Gas prices are up three cents a litre as the price of oil crossed the psychological threshold of US$100 a barrel for the first time ever. Upon hearing the news, Stephen Harper flew to the Alberta oil sands and gave a stirring speech about how victory would soon be his, whereupon he was roundly cheered by all the hosts of Mordor. A low-level mobster claims that in 1974 he was tasked with assassinating Pierre......

Torontoist is ending the year by naming our Heroes and Villains of 2007––the people, places, and things that we've either fallen head over heels in love with or developed uncontrollable rage towards over the past twelve months. Get your dose, starting Boxing Day and running into the new year, three times a day––sunrise, noon, and sunset. Probably the most stirring piece of art displayed in Toronto this year, Scott Sørli's "Common Sense Revolution" [PDF] juxtaposed......

Torontoist is ending the year by naming our Heroes and Villains of 2007––the people, places, and things that we've either fallen head over heels in love with or developed uncontrollable rage towards over the past twelve months. Get your dose, starting Boxing Day and running into the new year, three times a day––sunrise, noon, and sunset. No federal politician this year was a bigger embarrassment to Canadians than Environment Minister John Baird, and in a......

Oscar Peterson passes at 82. The great jazz musician was a Canadian hero and he did many amazing things, including spending the twilight of his career essentially playing jazz piano one-handed and doing it better than most people who had use of both their hands. Police catch 12-fingered man. Moral: if you have extra fingers, do not try to assault people. It's kind of a dead giveaway. Pope Benedict urges Catholics to "set aside time"......